Sometimes no matter how much we’re hurting, we refuse to see things as they are and tend to create our own fantasy simply because we’re afraid. We keep hoping things will change for the better, we ignore the red flags, and we continue to let ourselves suffer. The wrong job, person, or relationship can weigh us down and we really need to learn how to stop fighting for the wrong things. It’s not easy, but with a little practice, it is possible to master these 6 arts of letting go.
Be honest with yourself
First, you need to wake up from your deep slumber and ask yourself whether this job, person, or relationship is giving you what you need. Do you feel good or bad most of the time? If you spend most of your days feeling restless, frazzled, overwhelmed, or stressed then you have to learn to stop lying to yourself. Don’t run away from the tough questions because you will regret it at the end of the day. The moment something feels off, pause and reflect.
Put yourself first
Never make excuses for others. Instead of thinking you can’t move on, start telling yourself that you won’t put yourself through another bad situation and you deserve better. You have to know when to stop fighting for people who don’t have a problem with letting you go. Cut all ties with anything that drains you and doesn’t bring you joy. Stop holding on to people who betray your trust or test your loyalty. If they can’t value your worth, then they don’t deserve your blood, sweat, and tears.
Acknowledge what’s stopping you
What is really stopping you from letting go? Find out what is it and work on it. If you’re afraid of being alone, learn to stand on your own two feet and stop depending on others to fill in the gaps. If you’re worried about not getting another job, learn to have courage and be optimistic. Start sending your resume instead of just worrying about it. If you’re more excited about the possible future you imagine, stop living in a fairy-tale and start focusing on reality.
Don’t expect change
Stop hoping for people or situations to change because they most likely won’t. If someone you’re dating tends to go MIA often, then he or she clearly does not care about you. If your boss has a habit of looking for your faults no matter how hard you try, then he or she will never learn to appreciate you. If your work environment is unhealthy, then it will probably always stay that way. Certain things do deserve a second chance, but if something happens again and again, you need to pull the plug.
Don’t be afraid to dive into the unknown
What could be worse then what you’re already facing or feeling? Just remember that when you get rid of something bad, you will have more room for something better. Don’t waste your time and energy on something that you already know is bad for you. Learn to forgive, let go and move on. Forget resentment, tone down your ego, and leave gracefully. You don’t need to make people pay for your suffering – It’s just not worth it.
Never forget what you learned
Once you finally realize that things are better than they were, take note of it and use it as a reference for the future. You will see that you’re better off without the things that used to weigh you down. You will feel relieved and regain your inner peace. You will have better control of your life. You might even feel like a fool for not letting go sooner. Always remind yourself of this freedom and never give up your power for anyone.
Danila was a magazine writer focused on lifestyle topics and a communications specialist in the telecommunications industry where her work was published or broadcast via several offline and online media channels before shifting to freelance writing. Besides writing, she enjoys travel, taking photos, and reading.