Life is all about ups and downs.
Anyone would definitely agree with the statement about.
We rejoice when good times come but what about the bad times?
We tend to suddenly find the worst in everything.
Our negative thought process suddenly approaches situation, people or matter in undesirable ways.
What do we do with that?
We play the ‘blame’ game, take it out on others and perhaps, sometimes even ourselves.
This shouldn’t be how it is supposed to be as it’ll only lead to disappointments and disastrous emotional harm.
So what must we do?
Simple. If you’ll realise the outcome of all your negative thought process, you’ll be able to turn down any when it approaches.
I know this sounds like something that’ll take years to master but once you know what causes so, it gets a lot easier.
Besides, if you really care about leading a more positive filled life, you absolutely need to be aware of what’s causing otherwise.
I am going to break down the process of rewiring your brain towards positivity and help you overcome any kind of challenges in life with immeasurable optimism.
But before I do so, let me share with you a tale worth a thousand gold.
A wise man was travelling from town to town to share his message. Many people heard of his teachings and were always in constant eager to learn from him. As a result, many religious teachers lost their audience. One day, as he was visiting one tiny village, a teacher went up to him, in a state of devastating fury, the teacher began shouting,
“Who gave you the authority to teach others? Clearly, you know nothing of what should be thought. You are a fake!”
The wise man smiled at the teacher. He listened and said not a word until he was done with his rant.
Even after the teacher was done, the wise man continued smiling.
That only made the teacher angrier.
“What are you smiling all about? What do you have to say about this?”
The man only then spoke.
“Tell me teacher, do friends or relatives ever visit your house?”
“And tell me something, do you serve them with food and delicacies when they arrive?”
“Of course I do!”
“Then tell me this, if they don’t accept it, to whom do those foods belong to?”
“If they wouldn’t accept it, then those foods belong to me.”
“Yes. And so, in the same way I do not accept your anger and criticism, it is all yours.”
The religious teacher was stunned and could not think of anything else to say.
If you are angry with me and I don’t get insulted, then that anger falls back on you.
Understanding the final result to every negativity
Just as how the religious teacher reacted whenever undesirable circumstances occur, he was quick to find the worst in it.
Any form of resentment doesn’t solve anything. It builds nothing, but it destroys everything.
The main point here is that nothing good will ever come out of negativity.
And that’s how it is.
If negativity only leads to destruction, disappointments and regrets, why would you ever then lead yourself towards it?
As someone who used to have a short fuse, I can attest to that.
Here are some examples of how negativity looks and sounds like:
“It’s always me who has to face all the failures.”
“What will happen if I will not be able to do this?”
“Everything happens to me only.”
“I’m not ready for it.”
“I can’t imagine living without you.”
“I would have been happier if I had done better.”
“I can’t help feeling bad about it.”
“My past is indicative of my future.”
“I care what others think about me.”
“I’m never good enough.”
“There’s so much that could go wrong.”
“I will never forgive you. You are to be blamed.”
“I don’t like them because they’re not like us.”
“I can’t trust anyone.”
“Everyone else is doing it, so it has got to be right.”
“I don’t have time for this.”
How does it feel inside as you read through the list?
Does it feel like there’s a sudden surge of black thick clouds over you?
I want to take this moment to explain the real benefits you’ll eventually have when you replace them with positivity.
The Golden Nuggets
Positivity or the act of positive thinking is really more than just being happy or displaying an upbeat attitude.
It contributes to creating beneficial values in our lives and affects many areas of your health and wellbeing.
What more, positive energy spreads more positive.
It has a profound influence on the people around you and this is a huge deal.
Because not only you’ll feel good, your health improve, your stress level drops, your career starts soaring, you achieve things you never thought you could, better relationships, you feel confident, you’ll also affect others and allow them to experience the joy of leading a more positive filled life.
Being positive is not about keeping your head under a shell and ignore life’s less pleasant situation.
It means that you’ll have to approach them instead in a more optimistic and productive way.
In short, you believe the best is going to come out of it, not something worst.
Here’s how you can do that.
Building a habit
At the core, being and living a positive filled life is all about building a lasting habit that becomes automatic.
It’s very much like a work ethic or an athlete regimen; something you’ll gradually have to train your mind into.
Here’s how to train your brain for positivity growth:
Look out for 3 daily positives
I personally like to call this as spot ‘training’. It’s generally the idea of growing one specific area – in this context, your positive ‘muscle’.
At the end of each day, make a list of 3 specific good things that happened to you on that day. Reflect on what caused them to happen.
The other day, I was caught in a terrible traffic after work hours. Because the car didn’t budge an inch, I recognised the driver beside me was an old friend whom I hadn’t got it touch with for a very long time. We made eye contact and after I got home that night, gave her a call and we chatted for a few minutes before suggesting catching up over dinner.
The good things could be just about anything that makes you feel good – bumping into an old friend, a small compliment from someone at work, a pretty sunset, or perhaps celebrating a small victory.
Take note and record down 3 daily good positive happenings.
The better you get and feel about it, you’ll start noticing the proven effect of empowering motivation and igniting the joy of being positive.
Give compliment to at least one person daily
As you get better in recognising the positive things in others, let them know their awesome traits are noticed.
Our team practices such little gesture amongst ourselves. It builds closure and strengthens the bonds between us.
It could be just a little shout-out like a “thank you” or perhaps a small gift, showing appreciation for their efforts.
Don’t limit yourself to just friends and family; recognise others at work, the waitress, or a stranger who held onto the door for you.
Here’s a great way to start. Send at least 1 thankful email daily to someone.
Have the courage to show your appreciation to an old school teacher, the new colleague whom you were just introduced to or catching up and just saying ‘hi’ to a cousin whom you haven’t been in touch for some time.
Do random acts of kindness
It’s really amazing what little signs of kind gestures can do.
Not only it heightens the sense of happiness within ourselves and to those around, it effectively gets you out of the negativity thought loop.
It can be something as simple like buying a cup of coffee or holding the door for someone.
This small yet incredible act is infectious. The good deeds that you do get passed down.
You can try to have a to-do list which you can perform on daily.
Here’s a video to illustrate the positive impact when you do random acts of kindness for others.
Be aware of your own thoughts
Your mind is a powerful thing. When you fill it with positive thoughts, your life will start to change.
Be mindful of your present moment without the need to judge.
Expand your mind to understand beyond the narrowness of negativity.
Stand neutral, seek balance and anticipate positivity all around.
Positive thoughts generate positive feelings and attract positive life experiences.
There is no trace of good instilling any form of negativity in your life.
Like I’ve said, we only see to harm ourselves and those around us when we based our thoughts and actions on negativity.
Leading a more positive filled life takes practice and it’s much simpler; and fun, than you think.
What you practice becomes habitual.
I assure you that you’ll only need to commit yourself to perform the above exercises to connect more positivity attributes into your life.
These are the strategies that our team has built ourselves upon to ensure that we eliminate any possible trace of negativity within us.
This opens up to a more authentic, honest and vibrant working environment leading to a more fun and productive setting for everyone.
What are some of the other positive practices you do that has bring significant values in your life?